KANYE WEST IS A MOTHERFUCKING DOUCHEBAG. HE'S A MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE.
and you know what? i love him even more. i love his all caps tweets. i love the fact that his rhymes are disgustingly sick. i love his twisted beats. i love the fact that he has MOTHERFUCKING BON IVER on a track. yeah, that's right...
bon fucking iver of '
skinny love' fame. i don't know if anyone else knows that song, but i fucking love it. i love bon iver. i could write soliloquies on how much i love bon iver. i even liked him in the new moon soundtrack with st. vincent;
rosilyn? i don't remember-- it's been too motherfucking long since i cared about a gdamn twilight soundtrack.
*
insert blatant lie snort here*
i always fucking care about gdamn twilight soundtracks. i obsess over them like no other. it's creepy, i realize this and i apologize in advance for the onslaught of posts that will come in june, or november. when does that breakin' bed-posts, i mean,
breaking dawn movie come out? sweet jesus, i don't even remember. i think it's november. they're still shooting in some bog in louisiana, right?
who the fuck cares.
back to kanye.
BECAUSE KANYE DOESN'T GET SIDETRACKED BY MOTHERFUCKING DOUCHEBAG VAMPIRES AND WEREWOLVES.
i first heard
my beautiful, dark, twisted fantasy in my friends car just after new years. or was that just before? whatever. the point was, i was freezing my tuccas off and there, my little cherub faced compadre sat in his carhart hoody, waxing poetic over olivia wilde in tron and how sick the
turn on the lights track on the new kanye album was. it was at this point he started singing-- nay,
rapping-- in kanye's thought provoking fashion. i have to admit, the man writes a mean lyric.
i'm not uneducated in the kanye progression. i liked parts of late registration and college drop out. hated 808 heartbreak or whatever the fuck it was. loved the song
heartbreaker, though.
paranoid wasn't what the people needed at that point, and although it was poignant, it flopped.
then he had that whole mtv music awards,
imma let you finish, but beyonce had the best video of all time, i'm a drunken idiot whose girlfriend seems to be wearing a nylon bodysock, thing. then he was hated. then he started tweeting, and people were like, you're just a douchebag. make music, douchebag and shut the fuck up while you do it. oh, and you're short.
then he comes out with this and i want to jerk off to each beat. not the visual you were looking for? perhaps 'i would like to dance sensually with a member of the male sex on a hot, close, dark dancefloor in just garters?'
the music is sexy. it's raw. it's driving. it's
intelligent, oddly enough, an odd occurrance from the rap community to begin with.
for example, take these lyrics from
who will survive in america:
us living as we do, upside down, and the new word to have is revolution. people don't even want to hear the preachers spill or spiel, because god's whole card has been thoroughly piqued. and america is now blood and tears instead of milk and honey. the youngsters who were programmed to continue fucking up, woke up one night digging paul revere and nat turner as the good guys. america stripped for bed and have not all yet closed our eyes. the sings of truth were tattooed across our open ended vagina. we learned to our amazement, the untold tale of scandal; two long centuries buried in a musty vault, hosed down daily with a gagging perfume. america was a bastard, the illegitimate daughter of the mother country whose legs were then spread around the world and a rapist known as freedom, free doom...
you can't tell me that isn't fucking brilliant?! i don't care if that's another poets words. i don't even think it's kanye saying it. but seriously-- that. i think my literary heart just exploded and coated the world with happy sentence, syntax and fucking
meaning goodness. i feel like one of those cartoon kids in winnie the pooh (who incidentally was a bear in wininpeg, canada at one point in time, hence the name winnie. winnie, winnipeg; get it?!) when eyeore gets his tail.
so my recommendation for january, although i'm late as shit on this, is to buy/download illegally kanye west's
my beautiful, dark, twisted fantasy.
now.
and toast to some THE DOUCHEBAGS and THE ASSHOLES when you do it.