currents

one day, i'll write it into my schedule when to update. until then, enjoy these random nuggets when/if i ever get around to updating. a fearful day that will be...

i also sincerely apologize for breaking an (unwritten) personal rule where i hate on drake simply because i can, but god's plan was like an anthem this summer so... fight me.

xoxo
-- ffh

p.s.: totally not apologetic about the amount of kanye. my love for him is well documented.

10. delete delete - BOOTS ft run the jewels, cristin milioti
9. god's plan - drake
8. pookie baby - prof
7. all day - kanye, theophilius london, allan kingdom, paul mcartney
6. o.d. - memba ft titus
5. zodiac - onra
4. yikes - kanye west
3. freeee (ghots town pt. 2) - KIDS SEE GHOSTS ft. ty dolla $ign,
2. hear this - jarami
1. 4th dimension - KIDS SEE GHOSTS ft. louis prime

'... it feels so good it should cost. bought her an alligator, i ain't talking lacoste. made me say ugh, ugh, like a mix of master p and rick ross. she seem to make me always feel like a boss. she said i'm in the wrong hole, i said i'm lost. she said i'm going too fast, i'm exhausted. now drop to your knees for the offerin'...'

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something often overlooked

why have i never spoken about Watsky?

well, mostly because i live in some weird state between being before the trends and so far behind i feel like i'm entering into a foreign world when i finally catch on.

yet, and as i think on it, i don't think watsky was ever on trend. objectively, pale kid raps really fast was probably an ingenious move on his part, but he's just too much too soon, i think. he doesn't have the panache of eminem, nor the showmanship of busta rhymes (though the younger watsky definitely gives the veteran rhymes a run for his money). i'll explain further why i think that watsky is well beyond his time.

i've said it before, not here but in my regular person conversations, the arts are always maligned and none more so than poetry.

we don't get it-- they're fearful of it. it creates uncomfortable feelings, ones where the cadence of the words are often so foreign it discomfits us. it pushes us to think differently, to find metaphorical meaning in the mundane or overlooked, and we're just aren't that creative.

 i know for myself, i hate baseball. i think it's boring and pointless, takes little talent and is literally the worst thing about the summer/fall. but the main reason i hate baseball is that i'm fucking awful at it. i think people hate on poetry because they suck at it. this deficit is perceived, of course, because literally no one can be bad at poetry. but they can't think of those neat couplets, can't find lyrical connections a la lil wayne that seems to make it worthwhile and have decided poetry is hard to write and they don't like it. understandable. i'm not going to one day wake up and decide i'm going to watch the entire season of the yankees. i'd rather scoop my eyes out with rusty spoons. but poetry... ya'll are missing that pop fly.

i've always had an appreciation for poetry. it was always my favorite unit in english all the way from primary school all the way through to university. i can appreciate it, can debate it, can write it (though, in this day and age, who has the time... another debate for another blog and century). poetry makes the life we're given just a little bit more in focus; a little bit more beautiful, sorrowful, vibrant or indelible.

and this is why watsky is ahead of the curve, yet will forever be utilized for his mad spitting skills which in itself isn't bad, but he's so much more than a pale kid who spits really fast.

stemming from a history of slam poetry victories in his native san francisco, watsky spits lines that could find their home in a well-curated senior level poetry anthology. sure, the speed in which he delivers these gems is blisteringly fast (i get trapped up speaking slowly to my U12 students... i couldn't imagine ever speaking that fast), but it's the content of these bars that have me wondering why people don't sing his praises more often, but completely understanding on why they don't.

hey, you hear the one about the fisherman who passed?
he didn't just off that ledge
he just stepped out into the air and pulled ground up towards him really fast
like he was pitching a line and went fishing for concrete
the earth is a drum and he's hitting it on beat

how could anyone hate poetry when it's written so fluidly?

the reason there's smog in los angeles is 'cause if we could see the stars
if we could see the context of the universe in which we exist
and we could see how small each one of us is
against the vastness of what we don't know
no one would ever audition for a mcdonalds commercial ever again
and then were would we be?
no frozen dinners and no tv
and is that a world we want to text in? 

all i gotta say, is don't sleep on watsky. sure, some of his stuff is... tepid, like lukewarm tea on a chilly fall day it sits in my mouth heavily, ruining the tableau of refinery that i want to project. while he may not be an entity like eminem, or a ye or jay, he's sure better than lil pump and the plethora of mumble rap that bungles up my radio and that's a huge win in my books.

either someone just microwaved popcorn, or i hear the sound of a thousand people pulling their heads out of their asses in rapid succession. 

(tiny glowing screens part 2, watsky)

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currents

i've had a lot more time than usual this time around since i bungled my knee (playing recreational volleyball of all things. play competitive rugby for years and no injuries. play 3 seasons of rec volleyball and i fucking hurt myself. go figure?) so it's almost double the length.

i'm also shook by the ye album, and the subsequent cudi album, which sent me on a huge kanye/cudi thing so that also has a lot to do with it. 2008-2010 me likes to reminisce.

anyways, without further ado, the current playlist.

xoxo

-- ffh

15. ashin' kusher - kid cudi
14. wolves - kanye west & sia
13. simple as - kid cudi
12. waves - kanye west, kid cudi, chris brown
11. make her say - kanye west, kid cudi & lady gaga
10. tongues - joywave & KOPPS
9. haunt me - samsa
8. in cold blood (baauer remix) - alt-j & baauer
7. i thought about killing you - kanye west
6. cudi montage - kid cudi & kanye west
5. crown - flatbush zombies ft portugal. the man
4. yikes - kanye west & PARTYNEXTDOOR
3. 4th dimension - kid cudi & kanye west ft louis prima
2. ghost town - kanye west
1. freeee (ghost town pt. 2) - kid cudi & kanye west ft ty dolla $ign

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not miserable now

It all started with an Instagram post.

I thought nothing of it, as these things go. Someone famous was missing and their family was concerned about their mental health. I was getting my hair cut; I thought nothing of this overt cry for information. Plus, we were so distant from one another-- me in Canada and everyone in the U.K. Plus they're modestly famous-- famous people don't go missing. I moved on and put it out of my mind. 

It all ended with a CNN post. 

Scottish police would recover a body at Port Edgar the following day. The body? Scott Hutchinson, lead singer of Frightened Rabbit. 

The news article would go on to quote his twitter, giving a snapshot into Scott's final communications. They are, as one could imagine, heartbreaking. 

"I'm away now. Thanks."

I came upon Frightened Rabbit eight years ago. I don't remember how now, but I stumbled across swim until you can't see land and played it on continuous loop for about two weeks, despite my (actual) Scottish friends telling me to "turn that shite off." I loved the way Scott seemed to pour out his words; you could feel the pain and the hopefulness of someone who hoped they'd get better.

'She was not the cure for cancer. And all my questions still ask for answers. But there is nothing like someone know. This girl she was nothing like you,' Scott sang to me on my drive to school. 'The fun stuff is not so fun without you,' he would sing to me when I was missing my then long-distance friend-wish-benefits.

Things changed, and I grew up, but Frightened Rabbit was still my go-to when I needed to transport to 2010, away from the hustle of my life right now. The Woodpile was my strutting across campus song. Their songs were always on my playlists and will forever continue to be so.

Depression sucks. It makes you lose a bit of yourself, the fun parts, the parts that made you who you are. It makes you shades of greys; a monochromatic human as flat as a cartoon. There are times I remember that person-- the person who just wanted an adventure. Life beat me down, dulled my shine and now I don't even know what I like anymore. Frightened Rabbit helps transport me back outside of the greys, back to a time when there was still a sparkle.

I don't claim to say that I'm the cure for cancer, and I can't answer any of your questions, but there's nothing like getting to know someone new, because the person I'm becoming is nothing like I used to be.

I guess, thanks to Frightened Rabbit and therefore Scott, I'm not miserable now.

Rest easy, friend. We never knew one another, but I understood you. Thank you, so much, for everything you didn't know you were doing.

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currents

imma do it this time-- i have an update schedule written down. in my old age i need to write things down so as to not forget them. sometimes my life is a perpetual memento scene where i'm covered in fucking neon post-it notes. a mind is a terrible thing to waste...

i digress.

here's what i'm shaking my (wrinkly) rump to these days. some of it's kind of old, but it's new to me, dangnabbit.

enjoy, chumps.

xoxo 
-- ffh

10. two different worlds - epic beard men 
9. i'm having too much sex blues - netherfriends
8. sex in the city - hobo johnson
7. in cold blood (bauer remix) - alt-j
6. haunt me - samsa 
5. people suck - confetti
4. this is america - childish gambino 
3. freaks and geeks - childish gambino
2. sawed off shotgun - the glorious sons
1. the crown - flatbush zombies ft portugal. the man

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