house keeping and other odds and sods pt 2

i knew i'd missed somethings. i could feel it in my icy heart that i'd defaulted on my promises again. i am that deadbeat dad.
anyhow, you know the drill. click after the jump for content.

-- xoxo filthy fucking hipster

failure numero quatro
various artists - twilight saga: breaking dawn

i've gotten myself in so deep with this, i may as well just fucking finish it. so here we are. the fourth installment of five godforsaken movies. truth be told, i just watch it for a certain male lead to hopefully drop trou. i know this won't happen, but a girl can dream. and dream big i do.
i digress.
so the twilight saga soundtrack... well. words. i need to write words about this instead of emphatical head and fist shaking. i could punch someone in the mouth for this soundtrack. whoever decided the final cut should be given another mouth. aside from the emotional bs of some whiny, falsetto voices hipstery crap from the west coast, the album doesn't have a lot of substance. zero. i don't know if it's because i'm used to rap, or what, but this album is just... weak. it's safe. it's so for the awkward tween agers, and their awkward holding-on-to-their-youth mothers. my mom doesn't understand twilight. but then again, she's ancient-- she probably knows real life vampires. none of this sparkly bullshit.
anyhow, there are few highlights in this safe example of tween retarded pop/indie music. i don't know what to call this. adult alternative weak ass shit? future elevator muzak?
the only highlights come from the harder selections, the two rock-ier offerings and the new era hip hop song. aside from that, i liked the instrumentals the best because i knew they wouldn't be sappy shit.
it's an album to sleep to. if you have the option to buy it, avoid. wait until it comes on sale at wal-mart or something. don't buy it full price.
the only selections worth listening to:
i didn't mean it - the belle brigade
sister rosetta (2011 version) - noisettes
cold - aqualung & lucy schwartz
turning page - sleeping at last
from now on - the features

failure numero cinco
kanye west & jay-z - watch the throne

wow. i really slacked. really really. this came out when i was in new york in august. i remember. we crowded around the macbook at midnight for the automatic download to happen because it'd been prepurchased. it was all i heard as we drove to new jersey for six flags fun. it was all i heard when i woke up in a strange/not so strange bed with bagle crumbs all over me and a stupid nyer smiling at me. it's been around forever, and i've never given my two cents. wow. fucking fail.
i wish i'd written this when it was fresh and i hadn't listened to all the songs 800 times and chosen which ones i'd keep on my ipod. but i'll muddle through it. my memory isn't complete shit.
there's only so much one can hear jay and ye rap about being rich. it's true. i won't dispute this claim. but you have to hand them credit where credit is due. this shit cray. two greats, together?! what will they come up with next? i kid.
i heard otis well before i left for new york, so i thought the whole album would be a bunch of mowtown samples with mediocre rich people rapping overtop, boasting of their prowess both fiscally and sexually. ye is short, he's gotta make up for something somehow, twitter rants excluded.
i was most definitely wrong. there were no samples aside from otis redding. and fucking blades of glory. who the fuck came up with that idea? do you think jay-z just looked at kanye one day and said, "we should use will farrel and john heder's voices from that hilarious, award winning comedy about failed figure skaters, blades of glory. everyone saw that movie, and fucking loved it, right?".
if that happened, jay-z is more out of touch with what goes on in the world than my dad, and he still buys cassette tapes.
the album is diverse, i'll hand it to them. there are songs i'd want to shimmy to in the club. there are songs that are designed for driving on a highway late at night, smoking a blunt. there are some designed for being pumped through shitty club bathroom speakers so you don't hear the sounds of people puking and fucking. (** i want to have sex in the grey papaya bathroom in nyc. complex mag told me to **)
in all honesty, it seems to be a kanye puff peice with his friend jay-z loaning his voice to a few verses about bitches and having more money than i think i'll ever make in my entire lifetime. yes, jay, n****s hate ballers these days. unemployment in your country is 10%, man. get it through your head. ivy blue or blue ivy or whatthefuckever is going to grow up rich and privledge, never forget that. i hope 10 ghetto crack babies are her best friends.
like, who allowed this made it in america song on the album? who smoked enough piff to believe that this song was good enough to be on here? sweet baby jesus... sweet baby marvin. oh sweet baby marvin.
it's worth a listen. it's probably the plateau of great classics together on an album that is so ostentageous it's fucking grammy worthy.
quick listen, though you should just get the whole album, if for nothing less than to laugh hysterically at made it in america's sweet baby jesus'. sing it, frank ocean. sing it.
ni***s in paris
murder to excellence
no church in the wild ft frank ocean
gotta have it
why i love you ft mr hudson
that's my bitch
lift off ft beyonce
the joy ft curtis mayfield
really, i think i'm missing a few songs. just get the whole album. it's still good, no matter how often they label drop labels you've never in your entire life heard of. it's ye and jay-- this is gonna be fuckin' timeless when our kids are our age. this is probably going to be our generation's public enemy.